Have you ever wondered, “Where did I go?” One day you wake up and don’t know how you got where you are?
Well, welcome to Mommyland!!!!
Now, don’t get me wrong. I love being a mom! I would not change one decision I made related to having children. I just know that in the beginning of motherhood it is so exciting. There is a flurry of attention when that first little bambina/o is in your belly.
Everyone is asking YOU how you feel.
Everyone around YOU is smiling.
Everyone around YOU is giving YOU little gifts for the baby.
Attention, attention, attention.
Finally, after all the baby showers are over, the furniture is all set up and the pretty painted dressers are done, etc…..the day comes!
Even in the hospital it is a flurry of activity. All of your friends are waiting for the baby’s arrival. Your mom, your dad, grandma, grandpa, yada, yada, yada.
Then the pain begins, but you can handle it. After all, everyone is counting on you. Your husband is waiting patiently, anxiously, he loves you soooooooooo much.
Here come’s baby. REALITY!!!!!!!!!!!
Now, this part of the story changes a little.
Suddenly, you are no long YOU, now you are MOMMY.
Guess what? You are no longer the center of the universe.
Baby is. This is where I allowed me to slip away, and Mommy to creep in and take over.
Me, the musician, teacher, writer, etc, etc, etc, was gone.
Mommy needed to take care of baby.
Mommy needed to shop for baby.
Mommy needed to entertain baby.
Mommy needed to not focus on herself, she needed to take care of baby.
Do you understand where I am going with this?????
So, fast forward fourteen years later or however many years it is for you). Mommy is still taking care of baby, but now it’s four babies. And these babies are growing. These babies are riding school buses. These babies are watching Nickelodeon and arguing. These babies no longer need Mommy to wipe their heiny’s. They want Mommy to go and buy video games, iPods, laptops, etc.
Here we are. Here I am asking myself, “How did I get here?”
That is the million dollar question.
But, what is the answer?
How do I find myself?
In my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women, I will teach you how to rediscover yourself!
There is a lot of guilt associated with reconnecting with yourself and splitting up from the Mommy persona. It’s okay to be Mommy.
In fact, it’s wonderful. But, it is not okay to not be YOU. It is not okay to live and die by others needs. Guess what happens? One day, you look in the mirror and say, well I can’t write what you say, but you know what it is.
When you can accept that there is something different about yourself and become willing to make the change, then you are ready to read my book. You are ready to rediscover yourself and who you’ve become.
The first step to rediscovering yourself is to get re-acquainted with the women you were prior to Mommydom isn’t as hard or depressing as you would think.
Here are some tips to find yourself:
Take out some old photo albums
Look through the pictures (remembering you are not 20 any longer)
Recognize how you are feeling or how you felt about yourself then.
Read some old journals you wrote way back when.
Think about what you did then to be good to yourself and make a list.
Where were you working then?
Were you a professional?
Figure out how you can reincorporate this into your life.
Did you have a passion or dream that you wanted to fulfill besides Motherhood.
If motherhood was your dream, what can you do to create that picture of what you thought your life would be today.
Make a commitment to yourself to re-connect with YOU.
Buy my book and start reading!
Remember that you alone can create your life would like it to be.
No one else is responsible for where you are today.
You can rediscover the woman inside bring her to the surface.
Who you used to be will be twice as good today if you can merge the two identities.
Imagine how wonderful it would be for your children to meet the person your husband fell in love with.
And always remember, WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.